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The Bird and the Man in the Red Car

The red car was positioned at an angle behind the bird, its rear jutting out into the road, as if stopped in unintended haste. Situated behind the bird, his car could not have been the one that struck it. The driver must have seen it lying in the road, as…
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The Imperative of Sleep

Matthew Walker’s book, Why We Sleep, is an eye-opener on many levels. Reading it is probably a better prescription for bodily and mental health than a trip to the doctor, going on a diet, or running around the block. Walker, a PhD, is Director of UC Berkeley’s Sleep and Neuroimaging…
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Empty Brain Calories

Enjoying morning coffee on the patio, feet on a stool and looking out beyond the trees to the street beyond, I spied a runner jogging past. I’d seen this lithe, athletic female before and memory jogged along that she did 3 turns around this block. Was this the 1st, 2nd…
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Mozart for Mom and Dad

Classic music spreads tranquility but much more. Because of its complexity, classical music is the choice to play around newborns as they kick and tumble under their mobiles and young children toddle about. Listening stimulates neurons in the brain to make synaptic connections. So while the body and mood relaxes,…
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Cloth Diapers

Does anyone remember the joy of folding diapers?  I’m serious? Warm and clean from the dryer, all that was expected of you was to lift a handful, set this down and one at a time make the neat, even folds until the diapers are all piled up, then place the…
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We Don’t Go to Bed Angry

We don’t go to bed angry, that was a rule with the kids. It was to temper eruptions between a child and me or a feud between siblings. Rules work well, a kind of structural exterior to steady the quivering emotions inside. We don’t go to bed angry, we wait…
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HEY, GOOD JOB, KIDDO!

Underlying myriad cultural shifts in gender relationships, I sense there still exists a Me Tarzan/Me Jane mentality. At least for Tarzan.  Having been catchers and slayers of wild beasts, let alone principal bread winners for decades, a feeling of accomplishment for bringing home the bacon is in men’s DNA. Women…
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Happiness Enters Through the Senses

A feeling of happiness begins not from a state of mind but an impression of the senses. From sight, sound, taste, smell or touch first, and only later, the mind’s awareness. Nature affords this nutrition for the senses, which is just as necessary for a state of well being as…
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The Chipmunk v. the Mouse

Chipmunks are cute and adorable. Mice are deplorable, not cute at all, but why the stark difference? Both are rodents— run as fast, eat, and intuit similarly, even look a bit alike, except for one thing: one is pretty and the other is not. Chipmunks have colorful stripes and a…
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Glimpses

A large table in my bedroom had been moved away leaving a whole corner area empty. The next morning seated and lacing my shoes I glanced at the empty space so previously cluttered and was seized by a glimpse into the future. Not my future, for I was no longer…
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The Real Thing

It struck me that I was looking out at a landscape that was in these moments completely untampered with. The scene was natural, pristine, real. How unusual to feast on something, so genuine. A mist covered the trees and the lawn, a fog not yet lifted embraced everything, joining disparate…
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Getting Started Creatively

How to get started creatively in the morning on the stuff no one in your world cares if you do it or don’t? You have not started, you feel despicable and cannot stand yourself. You have chores with factual beginnings and ends, you have some kind of business, you have…
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Conflict Resolution: You are Right and So is He

You are absolutely right in the dispute, no question. He has inflicted a wrong-doing upon you, the logic of which is obvious. He is simply too thick-headed to see it; lives in his own world; blind to the truth; unwilling to face facts. Those are the facts as you see…
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CONNECTING

Seated on my patio enjoying my lawn, I looked up and saw a young deer – teenaged in human terms – staring at me. I stared at her. Motionless, we engaged with one another until I felt a need to break the long moment. I said “hello.” (Do deer talk?…
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Taking Myself Out To Lunch

Yesterday, I had a strong desire to make a lunch date. I wanted to be social or more likely, put off further what I was putting off. I ran through the roster of candidates. Sonia was bright and informed and would love to meet, but Sonia had cousins. On any…
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We Don’t Go to Bed Angry, That’s the Rule

We Don’t Go to Bed Angry, that’s the Rule We don’t go to bed angry, that’s the rule. It’s curious about rules. Rules are conceptually external to yourself and to others. Set apart from the particulars of events and situations, they stand like heavy stone pillars surrounding the tumultuous interior…
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Mom’s thoughtful advice to daughter on wrong boyfriend

Sitting opposite my daughter in a luncheonette after finally meeting the surly guy she’d begun living with, I made a little sigh in praise of coffee. As long as we could drink coffee together all was not lost. She looked at me and smiled, a little warily. “It was nice…
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Loneliness

All life’s passions, lofty, lowly, beatific and bodily arise from one source: Loneliness. Think sex, art, sex, charity, shopping… The desire, need, sometimes compulsion to do these things, if taken to their source seems to derive from the desire to connect with someone, to be a part of something. A…
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Empathy

So what was it about him that made me fall in love with him, and fall is what we do with love relationships, like trip or stumble, or roll head over heels; something precarious. It felt like an accident, surely something I didn’t plan on. Well, he was interesting; not…
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Happiness Enters through the Senses

A feeling of happiness comes not from a state of mind but impression of the senses. Happiness enters from sight, sound, taste, smell or touch  and only later is the mind’s awareness. Nature affords this nutrition for the senses, which is just as necessary for a state of well being as…
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