How to get started creatively in the morning on the stuff no one in your world cares if you do it or don’t? You have not started, you feel despicable and cannot stand yourself. You have chores with factual beginnings and ends, you have some kind of business, you have an array of survivor tasks that bond you to the world at large, and you have loved ones who collectively gnaw. Compounding this are emails endlessly streaming in like wild dreams whose source you cannot control.
Longing for a pre-online world is no solution nor is the 75 or 80 times you look out the window as if something out there can ignite a fire, or you fling open the refrigerator door to find solace in sustenance. Better keep water glasses there to sip while you count the calories of solace and close the door.) What is the solution?
God knows. And that is simply an expression, not an answer. Help is not on the way. Nor is finding the source of your shame, guilt, your crushing despicability. Perhaps as a start: shut off the computer, the iPhone, the door to the kitchen if by the grace of that God you have one and sit down to make believe you and your yellow pad are once again alone together. Then write something, anything, until the pain goes away. Mysteriously, it does and you are on your way.
Detours to the refrigerator occur anyway, but you are coalescing a thought, so it is productive.